Forever young.

soundtracks to my soul ♥

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e-mail: zhafhiey@hotmail.com
MSN: ixixy@hotmail.com

MIYAVI, my hero.
He changed my life, he cleaned me up, he found my heart like only HE can. He made me discover myself, he's my drive, my inspiration, my voice, my soul, my song, my heart, my hero. ♥ I don't think I can ever have built a passion and found a dream if I had never found him. He makes my day each time, and every song he has written is etched in my mind, my heart and my soul. I am very protective of this man because I don't like people making fun of whoever it is that has left an impact in my life. He is all I need right now to keep me going to achieve my dreams. And don't be jealous that a guy in magenta nail polish can get more chicks than you.

GERARD WAY, the first.

He is undeniably an awesome person with a wonderful personality. He is always all-smiles and not forgetting he has a lovely smile. Whoever fails to love this man fails so much, because they are definitely blind. I knew him before I knew Miyavi, and he did the first few jobs to straightening my life out before handing it all over to him. He got married to someone else already, but I am happy for him, of course I am (: He has been the bestest there is for the past 2 years I was obsessed over him.

BILL KAULITZ, my porcupine.
Bill makes awesome music and he, although young, is very talented and expressive. Miyavi is more expressive than he is, but hey! Bill just turned 19, and he definitely has a long way to go. He earned success through hard work and diligence, and for that, I love him to bits. He hasn't really done anything to change my life, but he's wonderful nonetheless. And yes, it's a he. A guy who happens to have long hair so you people think he's a girl. A guy whose face is effeminate and prettier than all you other guys out there. You're just jealous that a guy in black nailpolish can earn more chicks than you, just like Miyavi.

WILLIAM BECKETT, my laughing gas.

He's cute, I know. He's funny, even more. He's tall, has a great smile, wonderful personality, great sense of humor, wonderful singing voice, he's so... wow. I am not in love with him, but I pretty much look up to him and his group of friends, which includes oddities like Chislett, Mike Carden, Sisky and The Butcher to always make me feel better on days I'm feeling quite blue. They never fail to slap a smile onto my face because they are awesome and funny like that. Whoever has not seen these guys in action, but go and watch them ASAP because they. are. the. shiz. Great humourous bunch of people, who make awesome music as well. Who can't possibly love them!?

JOE JONAS, satisfaction
People who know me well, know damn well I do not like this guy. I don't even like him now, I'm just in this for the thrill. So yea, I don't hate him as much as I used to, but I don't like him much either. But, I'll have you know he's a damn good kisser and I should know, yes, I should know. And his saliva tastes like cherry/mint. No, don't even ask. Oooo, scandalous. And I just thought that after everything that happened, he deserved at least a mention for satisfying my lust.

Friday, July 25, 2008

Looking at all these photos, while listening to this song is a perfect reason to bawl my eyes out. Isn't it? Ah, stupid song.

I remember after our very first English paper.
Me, Tiq, Firdaus, Aq and Ryan were sitting at a table together.
Atiqah started singing the chorus, and her arms just suddenly flew around me and she said
"SHA DON'T GOOOO!"

I remember singing this song like a drunk outside the staff room which waiting for Ms Ng, and after that, Khairul. Come to think of it, it felt so good... yet it felt so heartbreaking.

I remember crying to this very same song exactly a day before I moved.
I remember crying to this very same song on the way to our new house.
I remember crying to this very same song on nights I couldn't sleep.

This song brings back so much memories. It just has this wave of nostalgicness.
And it never fails to make me cry all the time.

The image of my old empty apartment was... sad. We slept on the floor. Cold. That empty place, with boxes all over. Rushing through DnT homework. The smell of hairspray.

That's the picture this stupid song brings to my mind.
Staying in school till really late, just because I wanted to spend extra time with the people that meant the world to me.

I remember Aqilah and I hugging and crying outside the computer lab.
It was embarrassing, but I was glad I got it out.

I will never forget the first time we all met, last year.
How we were formed.
How we got closer.
How we expanded.
The times we spent.
The moments we shared.
The laughter, the tears. Everything.

Cliche, I know.

The Malaysia trip got us all together. Atiqah became my bestest BESTEST buddy ever since that day. Aqilah was my FIRST friend EVER in Anderson. Jaini, Bavani, Iza and everyone else just suddenly came into my life. I've never been happier. I really never have.

Have I ever mentioned how much I love you guys?
There's no point saying it here, because no words can express how much I really miss, really love all of you.

Thank you, all of you.
I may have known you guys for only a short while, but it seemed like we knew each other since forever. Thanks for making my year and a half in Anderson, one of the best, memorable and cherished moments I've ever had in Singapore.

And as I write this, I'm smiling so widely.
But I'm crying.
I don't know if I'm sad or happy.
But I know that what I'm feeling right now can only be expressed in tears.

I can't seem to let go... No matter how hard I try.
My heart's just there. Nowhere else.

Maybe Din was right.
I reminisce and cry too much.

You're all that I hoped I'd find in every single way.
And everything I could give,
Is everything you couldn't take.
Cause nothing feels like home,
You're a thousand miles away.

danishatiqahaqilahizajainibavanizuldin ♥
Now give me a moment, for I am tearing.
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10:59 PM