Forever young.

soundtracks to my soul ♥

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e-mail: zhafhiey@hotmail.com
MSN: ixixy@hotmail.com

MIYAVI, my hero.
He changed my life, he cleaned me up, he found my heart like only HE can. He made me discover myself, he's my drive, my inspiration, my voice, my soul, my song, my heart, my hero. ♥ I don't think I can ever have built a passion and found a dream if I had never found him. He makes my day each time, and every song he has written is etched in my mind, my heart and my soul. I am very protective of this man because I don't like people making fun of whoever it is that has left an impact in my life. He is all I need right now to keep me going to achieve my dreams. And don't be jealous that a guy in magenta nail polish can get more chicks than you.

GERARD WAY, the first.

He is undeniably an awesome person with a wonderful personality. He is always all-smiles and not forgetting he has a lovely smile. Whoever fails to love this man fails so much, because they are definitely blind. I knew him before I knew Miyavi, and he did the first few jobs to straightening my life out before handing it all over to him. He got married to someone else already, but I am happy for him, of course I am (: He has been the bestest there is for the past 2 years I was obsessed over him.

BILL KAULITZ, my porcupine.
Bill makes awesome music and he, although young, is very talented and expressive. Miyavi is more expressive than he is, but hey! Bill just turned 19, and he definitely has a long way to go. He earned success through hard work and diligence, and for that, I love him to bits. He hasn't really done anything to change my life, but he's wonderful nonetheless. And yes, it's a he. A guy who happens to have long hair so you people think he's a girl. A guy whose face is effeminate and prettier than all you other guys out there. You're just jealous that a guy in black nailpolish can earn more chicks than you, just like Miyavi.

WILLIAM BECKETT, my laughing gas.

He's cute, I know. He's funny, even more. He's tall, has a great smile, wonderful personality, great sense of humor, wonderful singing voice, he's so... wow. I am not in love with him, but I pretty much look up to him and his group of friends, which includes oddities like Chislett, Mike Carden, Sisky and The Butcher to always make me feel better on days I'm feeling quite blue. They never fail to slap a smile onto my face because they are awesome and funny like that. Whoever has not seen these guys in action, but go and watch them ASAP because they. are. the. shiz. Great humourous bunch of people, who make awesome music as well. Who can't possibly love them!?

JOE JONAS, satisfaction
People who know me well, know damn well I do not like this guy. I don't even like him now, I'm just in this for the thrill. So yea, I don't hate him as much as I used to, but I don't like him much either. But, I'll have you know he's a damn good kisser and I should know, yes, I should know. And his saliva tastes like cherry/mint. No, don't even ask. Oooo, scandalous. And I just thought that after everything that happened, he deserved at least a mention for satisfying my lust.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

You don't understand.
I am left with like, only 4 days to spend time with one of the best people I have ever met in the world.
And you are blaming for trying to make the best out of the time I have left?
I am going to see these people for only a few more days, and I am going to spend the rest of my life with you people.

Darn it man.
Darn it.

I don't care if you actually scolded me for always wanting to go out or something,
but if you were to say anything that would insult the importance of my friends to me, then I get really sad.
I really do.
And I get really angry.

How can you say that they are always with me only when I'm happy, and when I'm down, they just leave me alone? Have you ever spent time with them? No, you haven't. How would you know what they do?
They are one of the only people who could actually understand how I feel, and they know what to do to cheer me up.
Not like you. You walked in on me crying yesterday night and all you did was stare and look and left. I bet you had no idea I was crying too. Even if you did, I bet you thought that I cried because you scolded me, but no. I cried because of what you said about my friends.

Yes, I do admit, maybe I haven't been spending time with my family nowadays.
I regret, but you have to try understand too. I am going off to another place, where I might never be able to see my friends again, and I am left with a mere 4 days, but only a few hours.

And about me not trying to help packing up, did I ever say I wanted to move? No, I didn't. I would try to stop this from happening if I have to.
I don't want to see what I have here being shoved into a box and being labelled, because I don't want the idea of moving off to somewhere foreign. Some place I don't want to go to. You know this is the only place I would ever want to be.

Well, yea, sure. I can hear you say now, life goes on, the only constant in life is changes, you'll never know till you try and shit like that, but that is not me. I do not like changes. I will try out new things, but moving to another place where I have to leave the people I love behind, is beyond what I can do. I cannot do it. I can't.

I bet you don't know, how many tears I've shed staying up all night and listening to nothing but music. I don't like the fact that I'm going away. I don't like it at all. The people I've met here are such extraordinary people, people I know I can always rely on. I don't want to leave them. They've already got a place in my heart.

I know of someone who told me that technology would make the parting easier. Well, maybe it will. Many people have said that, but it just will never feel the same without knowing that their presence is here.

There's so many things to do,
yet so little time.
Very little time...

"One can never ask for too much."

12:22 PM